The Gift of Marriage


Today would be our 18th Wedding Anniversary. My late husband John and I celebrated 17 years together with 15 years of marriage and now I continue to remember our wonderful relationship.

Every single anniversary we celebrated with much love and excitement. We were never too busy, we never left it to another time and I will be forever grateful for this. Even after our daughter was born only four days before, we set up a picnic blanket in our yard and enjoyed a romantic lunch while the children slept. For us, anniversaries did not have to include expensive gifts or outings; we simply enjoyed the gift of time together. We both wrote beautiful long heartfelt cards, which I will always treasure. We left nothing unsaid; our love was visible, active and complete.

Ultimately we had it all, but more importantly we knew it.

Even when it was not our anniversary we would have ‘date night’ every Friday night. Our date was held in our lounge room and we would get takeaway, light candles and enjoy each others company while the children peacefully slept in their bed. My children tell me that sometimes they would sneak out to have a look and then creep back into bed. I hope these memories of their parents in a loving and joyful marriage remain with them always.

This will be the third anniversary I have celebrated alone and even though it may sound sad I can not help to remember our amazing years together.

On my birthday the year before he passed away John and I were lying in bed and John said to me “if you had your time again would you really marry me and put up with all of this pain and loss” and I said to him “I would rather have 17 years of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special”.

I will always be grateful for the gift of marriage. It taught me that it is possible to have a truly fulfilling and whole relationship with another human being.

29th July, 1995
29th July, 1995

This morning I woke up to beautiful homemade anniversary cards from my children and I am going to enjoy a lovely lunch with my family and have a special dinner with my children. But don’t be fooled it is not an easy time and as my twelve-year-old son said last night “it is horrible without dad” and I couldn’t agree more.


3 Replies to “The Gift of Marriage”

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