Tomorrow is my youngest daughters birthday. She will be eleven.
Since my husband passed away I have found the children’s birthdays quite challenging. The night before their birthday my late husband and I would lie in bed and talk about the details of that child’s birth, how we were feeling and the entire hospital experience. For our youngest it was a 20-minute labour so the story is fast and furious. Then we would say things like “I can’t believe our baby is growing up” and we would reflect on what their year was like and we may even comment on what wonderful parents we had become.
Before our first daughter was born I remember my late husband saying, “it will never be just the two of us again”. He said it with some sadness but soon discovered the joy and love children can bring your life. As each child was born the dynamics of the family changed again and you wonder how you ever lived without them. Before our youngest was born my late husband would say “I just feel like someone is missing” and when she was born he knew our family was complete.
I am now the keeper of these stories and private memories, which I shared, with my husband.
I always tell each child their special story but there is something unique about that time that only a husband and wife can really appreciate.
So how will my daughter feel tomorrow?
She will be excited it is her birthday and will have a wonderful day filled with all the love in the world. However, there is always that one moment when a look appears on their face telling me that someone very special is missing. I know this look because I have the same one on my face.